Welcome to the Archives

SuBBrilliant News Archives- August 1994

Past Articles of SuBBrilliant News for the month of August, 1994 are collected here for your convenience.

Most images have been removed to prevent  peeling and irritation.

Netscape (and MSIE) User's- use 'Find' from the 'Edit' menu to search the page.

[Return to Main Archives Page]

Front Page | Internet | About SuBBrilliant | Past Issues| Chat

August, 1994

Sinners on Strike

"Wages of Sin Too Low" Say Leaders

15 August, 1994 by Tom Merritt
Crying that the wages of sin have been too low for too long, thousands of sinners went on strike yesterday.

Most just sat down and threatened not to sin until the government guaranteed a wage hike.  Other sinners took matters to the extreme, doing charity work and attending church services.

"If this continues, our economy could be devastated and our world respect badly damaged<" said Senator Phil Gramm (F-Texas).

Strike leader at local 702 in Branson, Missouri said the union was demanding a long overdue wage increase for sinners as well as more flexible hours.

"We've worked hard to make this country great," said sinner Bret jones, "It's about time we were recognized and rewarded."

LEaders of the government, ANHUESER-BUSH, TRUMP CASINOS and the state lottery commisions are working around the clock to negotiate some kind of settlement with the striking sinners.

"We feel if they bargain in good faith," said August A. Bush III, " we can reach a fair equitable agreement."

Info - About SBN] [News][Back to Main Archive Page][Top]

Yours and Your Friends Actions Have Been Caught

15th August, 1994 Ms. Jameson

Dear Ms. Jameson,

A few weeks ago my friends and I stumbled across a nuclear silo.  We took some strange stuff that our Korean exchange student friend called Plootomeum.  Did I make a mistake in mailing it to him?

Confused in Carmi, IL

Dear Confused,

I have forwarded your name and the names of all your friends and family to the CIA.  A death squad has been dispatched.  Rest in peace.

Info - About SBN] [News][Back to Main Archive Page][Top]