SuBBrilliant News

November 1, 2005

Woman arrested for whistling

by Acedtect

Whistling woman(ATLANTA) A woman on a commuter train was arrested today for failing to get authorization to perform a musical composition.

Ms. Nelda Wilder of East Point was whistling a popular tune when recording industry professionals presented her with a bill. When Ms. Wilder stated she could not pay the bill she was taken under arrest.

“Ms. Wilder has wilfully performed this composition often without even trying to seek any permission or authorization,” claimed a representative of the recording industry. “The tune is quite catchy and lodges in the brains of anyone in listening distance. This kind of unauthorized performance and distribution takes food off the tables of some of America’s greatest artists. We need to educate the public. Whistling is theft.”

Ms. Wilder was released on bond but will face both civil and criminal charges.

The recording industry does not feel they are being overzealous.

“Ms. Wilder represents the worst kind of offender, a seemingly innocent one. It is this kind of abuse that is the most insidious and must be stamped out wherever it occurs. If people want to whistle their own compositions in public that’s their look out. We’re not trying to eliminate tuneless whistling, just any combination of notes that can generate a revenue stream.”

Filed under at 1:06 am

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