SuBBrilliant News

April 13, 2006

Rice thanks Iran for cooperating

by Acedtect

(WASHINGTON DC) Condoleeza RiceThe Secretary of State for the US finished up statements about Iran by thanking them for cooperating.

“We have had Iran on the drawing board for a preemptive strike for quite awhile but couldn’t put together even the flimsiets of excuses. We kept saying, what could be our hostages?” laughed Rice.

“Man, if we’d been Carter we’d have been in there in two seconds. But now with the enrichment of Uranium, we don’t even need an excuse. It writes itself.”

Rice had taken Iran to task for allegedly defying the UN by continuing with a nuclear program. Her remarks were made off the record and immediatelt sealed as part of national security.

Reporters were told if they ‘printed that crap’ they’d be told they were quoting Rice out of context, that she was at best joking, and they would be stripped of their press identification papers.

Reporters who stated there was no such thing as press identification papers were met with a “You wait” from Ms. Rice.

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