August 3, 2006
Secret World Leaders Miffed at Middle East
The secret world government called a hasty meeting in their buried world headquarters this week, to discuss the turmoil in the middle east.
“This is getting way out of hand. We did not approve this. It should not be happening. Not yet,” said one member of the council.
Among controlling the world economies, developing sitcoms, and flouridating water, the secret world government also schedules wars.
“There was a small skirmish scheduled for around now as I recall but somebody’s getting overenthusiastic. Or at least well ahead of schedule.”
An angry crowd of secret people who run the world filled the secret chambers for the first time since David Hasselhof was created.
“We have unprecedented attendance. Only the undead body of John Kennedy is absent. I believe he’s vacationing in Cuba,” said a spokesperson.
The secret government will debate several alternate proposals and choose a course of action. The plan will be covered up and denied by 5 p.m. Friday.